, originally uploaded by fe.meow.

I'm quite fond of you, Melbourne.

, originally uploaded by fe.meow.

I took this yesterday on the way home from work.

Look! It's my window, reflected in my lamp.

, originally uploaded by fe.meow.

Sometimes I go to Etsy and just do a search for the word otter.

Today I found an amusing print, a scarf and this cake topper, none of which are necessary in my life.

Shop Story #380.

I'm in the office doing the time sheets.

A woman comes in, let's call her the Drycleaning Lady, to pick a dress up. Ren serves her. She gets annoyed by the price ($17.50). She reacts by telling us that lots of posters in our shop are outdated. Ren gives her a polite brush off and then comes and tells me about the aforementioned exchange...
Me: Oh shut up, Drycleaning Lady.
Ren: She was just annoyed by the price. The dress was of a difficult material! (Ren knows about those kind of things)
Me: I don't like her.
Scott comes up to stand in the doorway.
Scott: Did you hear her?
Me: Yeah. I hate Drycleaning Lady.
Scott: Me too. She's smug.
Me: She's condescending!
Scott: She is!
Me: She's a smug condescending wh*re.

Scott bursts into peels of laughter and walks out of office. Ren asks him what's so funny. I overhear him saying the following:

Scott: Felicity just called that woman something that wasn't very ladylike.

Otters are better than crocodiles.

I am more afraid of crocodiles than the average person. Nobody likes crocodiles or wants one in their bath, but I can't swim in any body of water that looks 'crocodiley'

So it's quite happy-making that there are so many videos featuring otters telling crocodiles to eff off.

Please note the final scene in the above video where the otters say "YEAH, YOU BETTER RUN. DON'T COME BACK ROUND 'ERE, RIGHT?!"

I can't tell what's going on in this one. Are the otters trying to eat this alligator?



Otters are so much better than crocodiles.

Otters sliding on their bellies!

Weird Customer #2

Weird Mars Bar Guy usually comes in on a Tuesday, so I'm expecting him to turn up later.

He comes in the store to buy two tiny fun size mars bars. The exchange plays out like this.

Weird Mars Bar Guy: HELLO!!! (veh veh loud)
Me: Hullo! (trying to match the friendliness, but avoiding the excessive volume)

At this point Weird Mars Bar Guy seems puzzled as to why I am being so friendly and becomes withdrawn for the rest of the transaction.

I always thought it was strange that he was first so friendly only to so quickly become shy. But I was pondering the other day... maybe he is saying HELLO!!! to the mars bar and not to me.

She wears a mask

She wears a mask, originally uploaded by fe.meow.

This is the best photo I've ever taken.

Shirley

Shirley, originally uploaded by fe.meow.

This is Shirley. I got her as a little kitten from the cat shelter. She had been dumped, and was tiny and skinny and scared. Now look at her with her woolly winter coat on - so brave and pretty. I named her after the Billy Bragg song 'Shirley' (otherwise known as 'Greetings to the New Brunette') but she most often gets called Shirley Ding Dong for some bizarre reason. She lives at my sister's now. She likes playing with the leaves and running around in the paddocks. Since I moved into the city I miss her a lot, but she is not used to the road, so she couldn't come with. She's a country cat (who wears a bell and is not outside after dark so she doesn't kill native things, I promise)

Weird customer #1

I work in a second hand bookstore. We sell lots of things. Stamps and cards and earrings and chocolate and stuff as well as the books.

Bug Lady just came in. She looks a lot like a bug, which is why I call her Bug Lady (clever)

She comes in nearly every Monday to ask for $2 worth of 50c coins. She then comes in on Wednesday or Thursday to post letters or parcels. This is how that transaction plays out.

Bug Lady: can you mail this for me?
Me: Yep, I'll pop it in our mail bag.
Bug Lady: How long will it take?
Me: According to Australia post it will take about two working days.
Bug Lady: Are you sure?
Me: Yep.
Bug Lady: Are you completely sure?
Me: I can only go by what Australia Post say on their website, and that's how long they say it will take.
Bug Lady: So two days?
Me: As far as I know. I can't predict the exact amount of time.
Bug Lady: Hmmm. *looks worried*

There's nothing wrong with this conversation - except that it happens every week.